HEY PSYCHOS

Hey psycho.

Ooh look who’s paying attention!

Get your speech going from the JUMP.

Say something wild.

Throw us a joke, a metaphor, a surprise.

I once started a wedding toast with: “Who’s hotter, the bride or the groom? It’s impossible to say, except it’s definitely Chelsea.”

And I opened my emcee act at a Bat Mitzvah by lamenting: “No one told me the Rabbi was a Ralph Lauren model!”

I guess I like making jokes about how hot people are.

Now that we’re with you, give us the goods.

Just please no “I am here to talk about…”

Skip skip skip the filler. Throw us right in.

Y’all are PSYCHOOOOs.

J/K you’re adorable.

xox